I have so many things I want to talk about but just don't have the energy do even type it all today. My Mother is now in a facility in Indiana. We took her last night. She was so mad and so hurt when she figured out we were leaving her there. We had no choice. Medications needed to be managed by a Doctor and she was beginning to be unpredictable. The last 3 days have been roller coaster. I now have two people in my life who have been diagnosed Bipolar. Ironic since there is no blood relation between my Mom and my son. (I was adopted)
The events leading up to us finally committing her inpatient are s unbelievable to me. I will say only a few things about her actions. For those of you that she has called at all hours of the nights, I apologize for her. Daddy does not have Alzheimer's. I have gotten several calls from friends and family asking about him. He is perfectly healthy. I am told the brain can only take so much stress before it throws a switch, so to speak. It begins to protect itself. A way she does is is by convincing herself that it'Daddy thats sick and not her. Mom does not have Alzheimer's that we are aware. She was checked for it. She was diagnosed with Dementia. At this time we are unsure if the dementia is a being caused by the Bipolar or if these are two seperate issues. She is taking some portions of the truth and portraying it like it's Dad that's sick. She hid car keys from him. She tried to take his name off the finances at the bank. She even had some reps from a Alzheimer's clinic in Tennessee on the way here yesterday morning to have Dad evaluated to go impatient with them. As of yesterday she had not slept (not even a cat nap) for 6 mights. Let me say that again. She had been awake for 144 hours SOLID! (Make that 184 hours. I spoke with the nurse a little bit ago and she didnt sleep last night either)
Since the first week of Aug I have handled medications for her. Days I have dressed her, bathed her, drove her, shopped for her, fixed her hair, applied her makeup, cleaned her house, paid her bills, cooked for her, cleaned up her accidents, ect. I was rarely ever home. When I did come home my phone rang ever 10-15 minutes asking when I'd be back. She has called 911 several times for reason that made sense to her. We have been to the Er 5 times either by ambulance or by car because she went into whats called "conversion". Conversion is when the brain is so over loaded that it literally shuts the body down and she was paralyzed from the neck down. Sometimes for only a few minutes and sometimes for hours depending on how well we were able to talk her down from it.
Leaving her last night was the hardest thing I have ever done. She just couldn't understand why. She was hurt. And so was I. My dad and I had been her caregiver for months but it just wasn't enough.
I am sure Dad and Mom don't want their dirty laundry aired. The facts is, this is what I have been preaching for years. Mental illness is not anything to be ashamed of. Period. Shame on anyone who would look down on her, avoid her or talk rudely behind her back or my sons for this terrible disease.
A few nights ago we were in the ER at TJ with a episode of "conversion". She was completely numb from the neck down and was convinced she had had a Stroke. A nurse deserves to have her licence revoked for the terrible way she treated my Mother. She literally jerked my Mom up and told her (and I quote) to stop behaving this way because there was a waiting room full of people who were REALLY sick and not faking it. She said so many nasty things to her.Conversation is not FAKING! The brain does indeed shut your ability to move down! I inteed to have your job before I'm done, my dear. Consider yourself warmed. Bitch. Nurses think they are so intelligent when in reality the most of them are the most ignorant humans that walk this Earth. She was not faking this dear. For your sake I won't mention your name just yet. But heres the proof. read it.
Conversion disorder is a condition in which patients present with neurological symptoms such as numbness, blindness, paralysis, or fits without a neurological cause. It is thought that these problems arise in response to difficulties in the patient's life, and conversion is considered a psychiatric disorder in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders 4th edition (DSM-IV).[1] Formerly known as "hysteria", the disorder has arguably been known for millennia, though it came to greatest prominence at the end of the 19th century, when the neurologists Jean-Martin Charcot and Sigmund Freud and psychiatrist Pierre Janet focused their studies on the subject. The term "conversion" has its origins in Freud's doctrine that anxiety is "converted" into physical symptoms.[2] Though previously thought to have vanished from the west in the 20th century, some research has suggested it is as common as ever.[3]
Please remember my family. Me, that I can be a better Mother and prevent this from being Eli in years to come. And my Mommy that she might find the right combinations of medication and be able to come home to us soon
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