Tuesday, February 28, 2012

It appears I have a week to take a breather. Spring Break. I don't recall the last time I looked forward to Spring Break but I imagine it was 1998 when our Sr. class flew to California. 2012's Spring Break will not be quit as exciting but I inteed to attempt it.
I had a huge Psyc exam yesterday which I didn't fail nor ace. I have heard what the scores where of some of my classmates and I must say I'll take my grade happily. It's tough. As far as I know no one else in my class has chosen Psyc as a major and absolutely have no interest in pursuing it further. Most are happy not to fail since it is a requirement. Myself on the other hand, don't the class lightly.
Todays most exciting moment.....I finally have medication to cure my ailing bladder. To whom ever is responsible for the crappy kidneys I inherited: I don't like you.
If by some chance you have never been forchanant enough to experience a bladder, kidney or UT infection let me draw you a picture. Imagine the feeling that you get when you have seriously needed  to pee for approximately 12 hours and times it by 3. Are you imagining it? Good. Now, think about that "my eye balls are floating and I need to find a place to squat RIGHT NOW" feeling 45 times a day. You drop what your doing, run to the potty, jerk the 2 year old off the pot, and pee 14 nails and 17 gallon of acid. Ok, what feels like 17 gallon of acid in reality, is only 3.4 drips of urine. Ugh. And if your lucky, the ticked off 2 year old you jerked off the thrown in a hurry will beat both your shins with a toy rifle while your already doubled over in pain far worse then any of your labors while demanding to examine the camode water and toilet paper you wiped with because it is the most fabulous color orange from the AZO your eating like candy. :)
On a happier note.........Happy Hump Day tomorrow. May you pee in comfort and peace.

Friday, February 24, 2012

 The Flu and stomach bug has ran it's course through my house this house since last Friday. It was tough to kick. Yesterday was the first day I felt somewhat normally. It was a lovely day. Warm. 70 degrees in mid-Feb. All good things have to come to a end. I let Willa out to potty and 10 minutes later she had vanished. I searched for her most of the night and today. No luck. I have a theory as to what happen to her. That being said......if you know of anyone who has just obtained a new Yorkie, 2 years old, black/tan, docked tail, pink collar (which I'm sure has been removed), medium length hair, shy/timid with strangers and 4ish pounds, I am offering a $250.00 reward for her being returned. Me and the kids miss her terribly.

I have one of 4 exams Monday and I am a nervous wreck. I have studied daily trying not to cram it. I need some serious help. I'm hoping over the weekend Peyton feels sorry for me and quizzes me or at least lets me read to him. I have found reading out loud helps me absorb the info more than silently. Danny wasn't game for being read to today. He didn't feel well and he has never been a fan of books or reading. I have decided that I'll be happy with a C. Anything higher will be a nice surprise. She says that these chapters are the hardest. It's down hill from these. Thank goodness.

I have not blogged since I saw The Vow last Sunday. A-maz-ing! Ended oddly, but had many moments of pure brilliance.

Now, sorry to be short tonight but 20/20 is on and it's about plastic surgery tonight. :)

Saturday, February 18, 2012

 Spring cleaning came a month early today. Me, Evyn and Eli have had the house to ourselves for twenty four hours and I throwed down on this place. I vacuumed every floor, ceiling, wall, nook and cranny. I mopped ever hard surface, bleached everything bleachable and washed mirrors and windows. I washed down all the trim and woodwork in wood soap and then done it all over again twice. OCD flaring up you ask. Maybe. Danny hates coming home to a obsessively compulsive cleaned house. Usually he turns around and walks back out then calls and ask if it's safe to come home. Some use drugs to relax. Some use Yoga. I clean. It works wonders for the soul usually.

 Everyone is home now so I have to use a alternate form. Blogging.

 My weather lady messaged me during the night and told me to get my arse up first thing and go get the necessities. Milk, cigarettes and diapers. She knows I never turn a television on except for Thursday nights. I had no idea of the impending weather. She takes care of me. Someone has too, or I'd loose my head if it wasn't attached. I still will have to see it to believe it. It's in the fifties today. It's going to have to do some major cooling down. I wouldn't mind the five inches they are calling for. Five inches isn't eight like some are getting but I'll take it. That's enough to have a little fun with before winter is over.

 Apparently I still need to relax a bit. Danny says he's heard hammers hit nails quieter than I'm hitting these keys. I suppose I need to keep rambling until I'm hitting the keys easier.

 I done a very bad, terrible, no good thing yesterday. I caught the driver of a school bus in the parking lot at school. I hate the person I morph in to when I'm mad. This man has had it coming for a week and I kept putting it off. Peyton ask me to just let it go and I did several times for him. Yesterday I was out of the car and in this mans face before I realized I'd even opened the car door. Somethings I can let go of without ever speaking my mind. Unfortunately when it involves my children I loose all ability to shut my mouth. I have to be their voice until they can speak for themselves. Sadly children are never heard. Their opinions don't matter much these days. We need to listen to our children. Everyone deserves a chance to be heard. I won't go into detail about the events that took place on this gentleman's bus, but know it was a serious incident that was not corrected.

 I don't think I have given an update on Eli lately. He's struggling still. We all are. Seroquel was added a few weeks ago and in the beginning it proved to be the miracle I had been waiting for. Insurance will not pay for it but at that time it was worth the 300.00 a month. Now the sedative effects have worn off and we are reverting to his sleeping pill again as well. That makes his pill count to Concerta and Seroquel in the a.m. and Depakote and Seroquel in the p.m.. We use the Clonidine as needed. The Dr. has also ordered a low dose Ritalin at 2 p.m. that I have yet to fill and begin. So much has been going on that I can't seem to focus. Starting a new medication is nerve racking enough on top of the second set of truancy papers I received last week and the problems that are happening on the bus. Why can't things just be easy for a little bit? I wish I had my degree already so I could discuss everything with myself and actually have all the answers. I have always heard that people who love Psyc either know people who are crazy or are themselves. The verdict is still out on that.

(Danny says I'm still beating the keys. He's one to talk since he's drinking his relaxation and I'm simply blogging)

Now that I think about it, it just dawned on me that I have not shared the huge change I made a few weeks ago. I found homes for all of my Yorkies and Maltese. I went from twenty plus dogs down to three. I still have my two Danes and a Yorkie in the house. I raised her here. I kept her for a companion and for extra cash a couple times a year. It was a huge change. I had been raising puppies for 8 years. It was time to let it go though. Change scares the daylights out of me, but I done it. I have not regretted my decision for a minute since the last little yapper left. Same goes for WKU. Not only am I attending but I am sitting in a room of strangers and I am relaxed. It's safe to say I love it. A big ole thanks to Tarah who sit me down and spent a hour literally analyzing my issues with strangers and helping me to see they can't hurt me. In my personal experiences it's been someone I've known well who's done the most damage and it's not fair to others for me to automatically assume everyone is demented. I wish she has sat me down a long time ago. It would have saved me a lot of endless hours in this house.

 I don't think my chaotic rambling is helping. Maybe I should resort to what I know works. I think the bathrooms could use another wipe down. I hope your weekend has been memorable. I can't wait to see the blanket on snow that's on it's way. Expect photographs. If your going to be stuck inside in colder weather, I hope it's with great company.

Friday, February 17, 2012

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

 Funniest moment of the day: Zackary told a little white lie and despite how I hated being threaten with Hell as a child I slipped and blurted "Zackary, do you know where people go who tell lies?" and without missing a a beat he answered "Walmart."
 "Yes Zackary. That's exactly right."
I can see where my Gates of  Hell comments have clearly made a lasting impression on him. He wants no part of Walmart. :)

My FB stalking.....errrr.....I mean keeping up with public relations is taking a back seat to my Psyc Degree. One might argue the two go hand and hand. I would have to agree. Even tho it's turned back on I have been on it twice in two weeks. My name is Kathy and I'm 14 days sober. (ok, not completely sober, but you get the idea)

All the hair is gone again. I had intended to grow it out. Life gets hard. Kids get into trouble. Appointments have to be kept. The first thing that always goes is the hair when things get hairy. No pun intended.

The new Dr is going well. He only manages meds. That being said I need some good referrals for therapists. We are still seeing one at Lifeskills for the time being. Eli loves him but I like to shop around and have options. I'm always looking for something better. Things can always be improved upon.

Most worrisome moment of the weekend: Dad had a nasty fall. Broke a finger I'm sure, but is not, nor will ever be one to see a Dr. This man is why I hate whiners. He has been beat, bruised and broken from cattle over the years and has crawled back to the house at times and still never uttered one complaint. He suffers from deteriorating disk. Doctors tell him he will wake up one morning and be in a wheel chair. There are times I can see the pain in his face but he still never even so much as whispers a complaint. He don't have to tell me the fall hurt. I know it did. I love that tough man. I hope he don't suffer with the soreness of it long.

I received two bouquets of flowers today. Lilies from my herd and Lilies and Tulips from Danny. I HATE roses. It's no secrete that this isn't my first rodeo. At a early age I discovered Roses usually meant someone was sorry for something that would eventually end in me spending a lot of money on a lawyer and mapping out a custody agreement. Thank you. They are a little burst of color in this very cold and ugly time of year.

Class is going well. I have overcome the fear and it's been replaced by the fact that school is flippen hard. I use to dream about the hairy things in life that made me snap and chop off all my hair. Now I dream about Neurons and Chronological Order. Occasionally I even dream about rhetorical questions. :)

I'm still loving The Voice. On that note......watch out Paul McCartney. Jordis Unga earned a spot on my iPod with this one!!

Monday, February 6, 2012

Out with the old and in with the new. When all the judges started changing on Idol I had to cut them loose. I missed them terribly. It was a great way to hear music I wouldnt normally hear. I'm loyal to 94.1.

Two words. The Voice.

Love it. Last night I got to hear a little gal with a Janice voice. Spectacular. Blake described her as having dirt in her voice. (Dirt is not a bad thing when you can pull off a Janice voice) After a little iTunes serching I found the original. Anyone who has this sound will earn a spot in my iPod.

Sunday, February 5, 2012

I keep thinking back to the pep talk my friend Jean gave me a couple weeks ago. "Sometimes you simply have to let some things go." I'm trying, Jean. I'm failing miserably at it.

No words. Only a picture.